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It is raining outside. My friends and I were actually on our way to some places where we could have fun when it started raining damn heavily. Next thing I know, they had already sent me on my door! Poor me! Since the mid-sem break has just started, now I am officially all alone. All my demented housemates are gone. I would like to be gone, too. But then I realized my house is actually situated somewhere across the South china Sea and I should just stay here in Section 17, Shah Alam and be a good kid that I am.

And to tell you the truth, I'm fine. I've just been so used to it.

Whenever it is the mid-sem break, a few of my pals will kindly invite me to their hometown. "What are you going to do here all alone?", they will ask. It could be that they pity me, or maybe they are just being nice, you know. That is what we call manner, folks. But I will normally pat them on the back and say "You know what, that's very kind of you. But I am so used to it. I'm cool being here alone". And I mean every word of it.

Back in SMAKK, my friends would go back during weekends or if there was a week break. And I would normally stay. They would even have their families coming to the school and have a small chat with them, just to catch up with each other's lives. I think my parents only came twice in two years. But I was cool with it. I didn't whine. Well, I did cry at first but once I was able to settle in, I was good.

Then again when I went to Jengka for my registration and orientation week, I was kind of begging my mum to stay a little longer, at least until I was done with the enrollment. Well, that was because the taxi driver was urging my mum to be quick if she wanted him to drive her back. We came by a taxi and there were no buses coming in. My mum could not afford to wait for another cab because in such a place, (if you have ever been to Jengka), even taxi was a rarity. So yeah, she had to go and I was left all alone. It wasn't a good feeling, not when others had their parents (some with uncles, cousins twice-removed, granny, grandad, a few stepmothers) waiting for them outside.

Same thing when I was doing my pre-degree back in Kuantan. There was one time I was literally all alone in the whole male block because everyone had gone home for holiday. But I wasn't afraid. (I think I did hear odd sounds at night but I just turned the volume of the Playlist on my laptop even louder and sang along!). I didn't whine. I was cool with it.

Come to think of it, I have been in such situation for the past 6 years, including when I was in SMAKK. So what is another week? I'm cool with it.

You know why I don't whine when I am all alone? Because there will be a point in life when we will have to be alone and I have been well prepared for that moment. Being away from home makes me a person who tries to stand on his own feet and believes in his own self. It toughens your heart to not shatter so easily. A heart made of metal.

Best of all, being away from home makes heart grow fonder. When you are home, you don't really know what's so good about being home. You pick a fight with your brothers, having some hair pulling ritual with your sisters and sometimes you are hurt with your parents. You think their words hurt you, and you wish you were not home. Domestic issues befuddle you and you wish you could just running away. Away from home.

And when you are finally in foreign land, you suddenly can't remember what was so terrible about being home. you miss the fight. You miss your sisters' hair. You don't mind get hurt with those words coming out from your parents' mouth. You feel like you could be listening to them forever. You don't mind the issues going on in your family. You wish you could be home so that you could put things together. Because we are a family; and as the cliche goes, there is no place like home.

Why do you think you get so thrilled about the idea of going back home? Only one answer: because you have been away.

Happy Mid-Sem Break, everyone! :)



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